The arrow of vilAsinI
It was just before dashAnta. We were on the brink of shaking off the shackles that had constrained us for several years. We were happy that rather than wasting our efforts on the mundane, which attracted our fellow travelers, we had spent some time studying the purANa-s and even as the battle had just begun the sUkta-s of the veda. We decided to set out on one great wandering that resembled the course of a comet. We got out of the kArAgR^iha and accompanied by two chaturtha-s and rode up to a rasashAlA some distance away. There the 3 of us ordered ikShu-rasa, the spinach bhR^ijjika and took our seats under a sprawling chi~nchiNI tree, where we were to be favored by the devI vakreshvarI. For about half an hour we savored the food and drink talking of the past years that had flown past us like the great suparNa in the quest for soma. I was the bhArgava, whose ancestors saw time, for the shruti says: “kAle .ayam a~NgirA devo atharvA cAdhi tiShThataH ||”. Hence, I saw the great Chidra that opened in the 4th dimension that my shUdra companions did not perceive. After that session at the rasashAlA we rose to depart. We all moved to our ashva-s when I saw the shUdra durmukha vanishing for ever into the Chidra that was opening up. Knowing the nature of kAla we smiled: “kAlo ha vishvA bhUtAni kAle cakShur vi pashyati |”.
We then crossed the shrine of The god and having worshiped his li~Nga proceeded to the udyAna. There we espied her of yakShiNI-like form with her thick kesha enveloping her skandha, stana-dvaya, marble-like pR^iShTha, even as the monsoon nebulosity spreading from the ko~NkaNa. The sight of her stanau made one attain brahmaikya for on seeing them one said I am indra and you are viliste~NgA. Her nAsa shone like a fair svaru of polished khadira wood attached to the yUpa at an yAga and her eyes sparkled like the kR^ittikA-s on a winter night. The sight of her nitamba-bimba made one lose the concept of time as thought eternally stationed in the vishuvAn. We had the saubhAgya of the rati emerging from her klinnavoru-dvaya. In her ali~Ngana and chumbanadAna we felt that we were invincible. If only the grasp of the kAlAjagara were as pleasurable as her bhujabandhana-s then who would verily fear kAla at all? We had thus had a brush with the bhoga which few ever get to enjoy. In the end the wide snarling mouth of kAla swallowed even this bhoga, verily like the invincible droNa, sUtaputra and bhIShma entering the mouth of the all consuming kAla in the vision of savyasachi. At that moment we saw the two flows of rati – the lower stream and the higher stream. We rushed by natural tendency to the lower stream but the intense pleasure of rati suddenly turned into the very fire of the wrath of rudra. Then looking up from the stream of pain we saw the aperture of the higher flow. But by what upAya where we to get there? Was there a yAna? Or were we to perish in the wrath of sharva emanating at the destruction of the dakShAdhvara?